by Dr. Karen Sherman www.drkarensherman.com Dr. Karen Sherman offers information to help couples deal with potential relationship difficulties. Setting The Mood Well, the big day has finally arrived! After months of planning, the culmination of all your efforts, hard work, and energy is here at last - your wedding day! Excitement is in the air. You’re a little nervous, but that’s natural. Imagine that you are now getting ready for one of the biggest days in your life. You look into the mirror. How beautiful you look! Your hair is exquisite, your make-up is perfect, your nails sparkle. You’ve put on all your pretty new undergarments. Maybe some old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. Now, it’s time for your dress. You are carefully assisted by those who love you most - your mother, your sister, your maid-of-honor. Maybe they shed a few tears of joy, but you refrain - you can’t risk having your mascara run! Okay, it looks like you are ready for the big event! Stop! Look back into the mirror one last time. Are you wearing a smile? A silly thing to ask, you say. Of course, you’ll be smiling. This is the happiest day of your life. But then you can’t help but think about all the things that could go wrong. You took such care in selecting the clothes, the colors, the menu, the cake, the music, the flowers. You want it to all be so perfect. But sometimes there is a mistake and something happens that you didn’t plan. This is certainly disappointing since you worked so hard on every detail. But you are the only one who knows what choices you made, and most likely, you will be the only one who will notice the error. Hold on to the bigger picture - the overall day and it’s meaning - rather than getting caught up in details. In the end, it really does not matter. The only thing that is important is that you and your new spouse, your family, and your friends share a day of happiness and celebration. One of the best guarantees that you have to make this special day memorable and fun for all your guests is for you to have fun. People are highly influenced by how others are acting. Words do not have to be used; the message is sent through body language and a general atmospheric sense. Have you ever walked into a room and “felt the tension?” Then you know what I am talking about. Your mood will set the mood for everyone. Of course, a little bit of tension is not going to make a difference. But if you walk around stiff and up-tight throughout the reception, this will spread to everyone else. What should be a time that is festive and joyous takes on a feeling of discomfort and uneasiness. This is not how you want your wedding day to be remembered. Research shows that your brain receives signals from your face muscles. If you are smiling, your brain thinks you are happy. And if your brain thinks you are happy, then you are happy. So, put a smile on your face. Even if you have to force one initially, before long it will come naturally. Soon you’ll be smiling, not from your brain, but from your heart. Copyright © Dr. Karen Sherman www.karensherman.com